45 is the new 100%

i'm not sure how it happened exactly, but i completely missed Wednesday last week..like i was so sure it's Friday today, n although everyone was referring to it as Saturday, i was completely unfazed..until about 2.am this morning..shit, i completely missed Wednesday..that's why i thought it was Friday..sigh..

and this matters because i thought i'd still have today to open my bank account and get a mobile plan and pass my passport to the school for verification and meet a NHS consultation slot and lots more! ugh..i feel so stupid......

now all i can do is go to the city centre n get my shoes changed n buy some groceries..wtf man..

a wasted end to the week..

so yesterday was the "pre-introduction"(?) to the MArch course..i freaked out upon arrival..seriously..i was the only freakin asian in the room when i walked in..it's soo freakin racist of me, but it just really scared the crap out of me..but eventually i think it's a good thing though..i forced my way into studying in the UK because i wanted this out-of-the-norm experience..so this is it, n it's a good thing..(n when i say "forced" i really mean it, like i maneuvered everything possible around me to get to this point)..so i guess "be careful what u wish for" really applies..

like, i've always known that i have inferiority issues..so honestly i was disappointed that i didn't make it into Bath or Sheffield for their MArch (they're my top choices), n almost everyone i know who applied for Liverpool got it, so i didn't think much of it..but after yesterday i was like "ok...."..because the way they do it here is that the head of programme chooses his students personally, like he actually vets through all the applications himself, n he's someone who remembers specific parts of peoples portfolios but maybe not their names..

he actually said this to everyone, "i want you all to know that out of 250 applicants only 45 of you made the cut, and you should know that you're here because we think that you're really good and that you would be able to do this course very well"..and that just honestly made me feel like a million bucks..it just made my day..my freakin week even..i don't care if anyone else agrees, but if someone, a practicing professional architect who validates architectural courses internationally to be exact, thinks that i am worth his attention in this unforgiving architectural universe of scrutiny, i am happy..honestly..dramatic..hahahahaha! :p

it also freaked me out how you could cut the competitive tension in the air with a freakin plastic spoon!..like everyone's here to kill it i felt..it was really intimidating..everyone ranged from about 22-25 years of age, so it's a fairly young class..n everyone is at least a head taller than me, even my new found Malaysian friend/studiomate Chloe..sighhhhhhh..freakin short stuff..my elstonian flatmates were joking about how small i was that they're just so afraid when they hug me or accidentally bump me i'll break..geez..i'm so freakin asian ok..damn..hahahaha

on a lighter note, i don't think i'll be hooking up with any of my coursemates..hahahahahahahaha..not that there aren't any good loking ones, like there's freakin loads, apa jenis u nak? cute blonde, edgy dark eyed brunette, jocky looking, chillax long haired grunge, the general handsome ones, yang pendek macam asian pun ada, seriously like anything..it's ridiculous..but like it's soooo tensed, like i can feel it already, the sizing up, the discriminating stares..like hey, i'm doing it too man..it's normal..i think that everyone would just end up hating/respecting each other too much..there's a very fine line between, yeah?..haha..i don't know..but this is a good kind of tension though, i feel that there's a colourful aura to it, not like the usual creepy "i'll stab ur back n with hold information ones" that's familiar..so it's all good so far :)

ok, so this is getting a bit too long..n i still have no photos to break the post into enjoyable portions..so until the next time i feel like writing again :) hopefully by then got photos already..

be happy, don't worry..watagatapittusberry!

- Pittbull & more