This space contains the ramblings of a post young adult who's in be warned..i have not got around to updating the links on the left hand side, so also be warned, some of them will lead you to n o t h i n's probably important to also clarify that i write for personal pleasure, thus, most posts are indulgent, whiny or both..happy reading :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Panda on My Table

Another 2 am post....

i'm so tiredddddddd ~**  (#__#) .....

i wanna go home, to the mattress, in front of the fire...and sleep...

come on human, don't burn out now !

PS : happy anniversary dearest <3   i am so thankful for you  :)  
wishing us many many more to come.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Blind Panic

i find myself writing this post because i'm emotionally disturbed's like i blog only when i need to vomit compressed needy :p

its 5 days to final crit, my last project in this long and adventurous journey of architectural education..hopefully (iA)'s a thesis in a group of 4, very different from other schools that are usually an individual exploration for about 12 months..but here in this School of Architecture, we have an additional module that's incredibly invaluable i think..and thus making our thesis a crazy explosion of about 30 weeks..i don't care what anyone says or thinks, this sh**t is hard !

5 days is not too short a period neither is it ever enough in studio terms..yesterday was the beckoning of a blind panic mode and a break over dinner almost drove me to tears composing myself from a nervous breakdown..a studio mate described the feeling perfectly, "there's so much work, and i'm just so tired and hungry.."

despite being physically self-abusive (writing a miserable blog post at 2.40am to calm down), it's almost that time of the month again and i find myself emotionally abusive as well..being so unstable, needy and embarrassingly paranoid..when i really think i've finally found my guy i'm really worried that i might just drive him away with my crazy-ness..or i might just loose it all together where my mind betrays me and i convince myself i'm better off miserable and alone for life..i pray upon prayyyy it will never come to that..

 ok, i feel better now..back to breaking my back and ruining my posture.. approximately 1 month to the end of the end of THE ENDDD..the much awaited graduate show..

i pray that all will go well..i pray we will all pass and move on with the next chapter of life..i sincerely pray....

and let there be success and gratefulness at the end of this journey,  iA...

~ Blue Skies ~

Saturday, February 18, 2012


Was reading a funny photo comment on Pudu Jail on Facebook when I realised I never knew how it looked like in aerial view. This led to google and the stumbling upon updates on the Pudu redevelopment plan.

It's depressing really looking at the state of dialogue within the country. Many forums, sites and articles mainly discuss it's economic and political feasibility with hardly any concern on cultural, social and accessibility impact. One particular 'expert' involved in the redevelopment was even quoted saying "'s all about rebranding properly, people will eventually forget after a while. Especially with the new generation buying into the market..."

Are you serious? Is this the way we as Malaysians treat history? We are more concerned with taboo and bad vibes compared to the issue of heritage and national identity? How are we suppose to feel any sort of patriotism if we intentionally choose to forget things in our past for convenience?

It's completely appropriate to redevelop the area due to its location, but such stupidity is unacceptable. Apartments? Office Space? Yet another commercial complex? A vehicular transport hub, on that point of Jalan Hang Tuah?? Have we really not learned being more than 50 years independant?

There is more than just commerce involved in making KL a "vibrant livable city". Everyone is so concerned about making the most profit, no one stops to ask the more important questions. There are so many underlying issues that need to be addressed.

How can we make KL more accessible without relying on vehicles? Out of the people who commute in and out of KL, what is the percentage of those who actually live in KL? Do we then need to provide a better public transport to network the outside of KL? Being a historical city centre in its own right, where are the evidence? Are these attractions accessible? What are their urban functions? What is the global image that KL represents? What are our existing gardens and parks like? Why don't we choose to link them? Why do people prefer not to travel on foot? Do people feel safe in KL? Why if Yes or No? This can go on forever to be honest, and it's things students in the industry learn but why is it so hard to be applied in 'real-world-Malaysia'. Why then can other countries do it?

Yes, something should be done as part of the greater KL city plan, but I'm convinced we as Malaysians can do better than this. Let's stop being so greedy and explore a larger picture.

I'm appalled at the investors that had initiated the Pudu redevelopment, I'm angry at the government for not intervening immediately enough, I'm frustrated at the general crowd that discusses shallow opinions on the matter, I'm completely pissed at LAM and PAM for not doing anything nearly enough, I am mostly so angry at myself for being so ignorant of this previously that I didn't do anything either.

Will mentality be the continued delay of our nation? Will we ever rise above this...

When will we choose to step-up and do something rather than complain on the sidelines? What can I do to affect any change, whattttt??! frustratingggg

Friday, February 17, 2012

Ryan Red

Meet my vintage sweater named Ryan. He is a terribly festive red. We don't know how Ryan got his name, but we are incredibly thankful for his warmth and comfort. Thank you Ryan, you've wooled me through winter.

Eternally greatful,

your sleeping buddy

Word of the day :

"mammonism" - the greedy pursuit of riches very interesting...

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Quick Fix

i haven't been actively blogging for a while now, i realize..lot's of things have happened..yes..but now i want to talk about other things..haha!

i broke my glasses last month, which can be said to be last year..hmm..luckily, i had foresight to make a pair of spare for cheap back home during summer..i wear them at night when i'm home usually as my day glasses are a bit heavy..but now that i have to wear these everyday i hate it :(

i have come to appreciate the magic of larger framed spectacles! simply, i can see more without squinting and they make my eyes look bigger as i am naturally "sepet". Kesian my spare glasses, i don't mean to hate..i think i'm giving it negative vibes which it does not deserve..

the other day i took off my specs to use the shower, then i forgot where i put them. It took me a good half hour to locate my glasses (yes, i am quite sadly optically disabled now) and i had to result to holding up my broken pair of glasses to find the good ones. FYI, i only occasionally wear contact lenses now as i'm kind of "allergic" to them due to other reasons that we don't have to talk about.

so why am i going on about this again? hmm...

i know..i guess because i'm tired, i'm almost bored of doing this thing called dissertation and i'm missing home all of a sudden..again. I want to spend time with my recently pregnant cousin, i want to annoy my brother, i want to see my Popo, i want to lo-sang; twice, one with my Ah Yie, Uncle, Popo and cousins and another with my Mak Ngah and Mak Teh..most of all, i want to watch tv in the hall with my parentsss! arghhh..

winter blues are so depressing..

ps : thanks SB for randomly holidaying in really glad i got to come down and see you for a bit..absolute highlight of my January :)

Monday, December 5, 2011


E : Do you play "noodle-jump"?? (this is what i heard)
A : no, what's that?
E : it's when you tilt your iPhone or iPad to jump on to the levels..
A : ...i don't understand...
E : because the level is bouncy..
A : ...
E : can i show you??
A : ok...but what are "you"?..
E : "you" are...a thing
A : (hahahahaha!)

i now know it's a game app called Doodle Jump and "you" are a doodle that looks like a potato squid...

i want iPad..